Friday, May 14, 2010

Two Men...

Good Morning Company Girls....

As some of you may already know..it's been an especially difficult week.

On Tuesday we buried my dad.

It was a lovely funeral service, as funerals go...the music chosen were some of dads' favourites...'A Wonderful Saviour', 'The Well is Deep', My All is on the Altar', my daughter Leslie, accompanied by my niece sang 'The Love of God'.....while she was singing my wee little mother raised her hand in praise as she wiped away the tears...another daughter Lauren read one of the scriptures...the one in 2 Timothy where it talks about fighting the good fight, finishing the race....which was my dad...he fought right up until his final moments...not that he didn't want to be with his Lord but the protectiveness that was ingrained in him over 66 years of marriage, to stay with my mom, to look after her, kept him fighting.....

Now, life goes on....my mom putting one foot in front of the other....the rest of us dealing with all the necessities..my sister spent the afternoon at the bank with mom yesterday...all the legalities..they're overwhelming....we must go thru their house, sort thru the remaining furnishings and belongings, clean it and get it ready to go on the market, sell dad's car...he loved his cars...he was that kind of man..took extra care with them..

Yesterday, I took my youngest to a sudden trip to the orthodontist to get a wire put back on her braces that came off on the weekend, then in the evening, took one of my sons to a special banquet for exceptional kids where he had been nominated for an 'I Can' award. Then, I hurried home because an officer from the Ontario Provincial police (I guess in the states that would be your state troopers) was coming to the house to take Corey's statement about the accident he had a few weeks back.....because Corey is still living with the woman that a judge ordered him to stay away from, means he's in breach of his probation....so the officer and Corey had to meet at our house. The trouble was that it scared Corey...when you've been in trouble with the law before, then a cop coming to your house is rather intimidating. Corey handled the situation the only way he knew how...he got drunk.

When he refused to leave his buddy's house to come here, I went and got him...brought him back for the officer to question. It went fine and thankfully Corey is a drunk that actually sounds halfway intelligent when he's drunk except for repeating himself....then I drove him home, listening to him talk all the way about how he was going to sue his friend, the driver of he motorcycle...he was going to get a lot of money...going to buy a M-15 weapon....I told him that that would get him in prison for the rest of his life...of course he didn't believe me...I really didn't believe him either...personally, I don't think he should get any money...he was just as drunk as the driver, just as responsible for getting on the back of the motorcycle...yes, his body still wears the scars and sores from the accident...so what....consequences of his choices, I say. As we got close to his house, I remembered when he was 4 years old and he graduated from nursery school, I overheard a conversation that he had with himself where he was pretending that I was telling him how proud I was that he had graduated and he was saying back to me...'thanks mom'....

So, when I pulled into his drive I said, 'Well, Corey,..I'm proud of you for coming to the house tonight and talking to the officer...it was the right thing to do'....He gave me a hug and said 'thanks mom'....just like when he was 4 years old. He's a mixed up little kid in a 26 year old body that's addicted to alcohol...a life royally screwed up....

Two men....one my dad who made choices at 19 to get married and go overseas to fight in the war, who lived a good life, an honourable life.....
...and the other one, that, due in part to his genetics, to his birth mother drinking while pregnant with him and damaging his brain......is probably due to continue living his life in this vicious circle of confusion and alcohol...how much could he help, could he control...I don't really know..I guess that's why I haven't given up on him yet...and I know that God hasn't ..

Two men...the choices they made......two different lives.

6 comments:

Jen said...

Oh my. I started tearing up just when you were talking about your dad (I recently lost my grandmother), but then to see your anguish over what is happening with Corey...

I pray comfort and peace for you.

Katharine said...

Thanks for stopping by my blog today...I'm so sorry for your loss. Blessings, and peace on your day!

Aiming4Simple said...

Wow. The contrast is stark, as you pointed out so clearly. It must be so overwhelming to love someone who struggles so much. And yet God is not overwhelmed, saddened though He may be. It's good that you know where to turn, and I pray your son will turn to God too.

UKZoe said...

Your comment on my blog about going to the botanical gardens brought back some fun memories. Our nearest one is quite a distance but it is fun, I think we'll have to plan a visit for in the summer.

joyceandnorm said...

So many things shape who we are and become. That is a difference. But how amazing that God loves both of these men the same. I pray that He will continue to work in Corey's life.

Cathy said...

Big Hug Marie!! It's been too long since I've visited! I am so sorry for the loss of your dad! I rejoice with you that he is with our Lord with a restored body and no more heartaches of this world. BUT I know you still miss him. Praying for your comfort and peace as your grieve his loss.
And Corey, I'm so sorry. Will continue to pray he will turn his life over to the Lord. You are so right God has not given up on him.
I hope you have a blessed week friend!
LydiaCate