Friday, February 26, 2010

Luggage

Good Morning Company Girls!

Well, the Olympics are almost over...did you watch very much of it? As a Canadian I've been very proud of all the fine work our athletes have accomplished in the last two weeks. In the opening ceremony there were many contributions by Canadian artists, one being a poet named Shane Koyczan.....he recited a poem he had written entitle "We Are More".....I listened with fascination because he was so good...I didn't know who he was but he put such feeling into the words....as I listened these words caught my attention....

'don't let your luggage define your travels...each life unravels differently'...

As a mom of nine with seven being adopted, I thought immediately of my children.....I thought about how some children are already born with a lot of heavy and cumbersome luggage and some aren't...others gather it along the way.....but it's what you do with this luggage that defines who you are......and how each life unravels differently....some of our children have birth siblings that are in other families...they and we don't understand why there lives have unravelled differently then their own......but the whole point is...don't allow this luggage or baggage as I like to call it...define who you are.....many people say....I can't help who I am..I inherited it...it's in my genes......to some degree this is true....but if it's something that you can purpose, with God's help to change...well, then ..you can't hang your hat on that...you cant use it as an excuse for your behaviour or your failures in your life. For instance, my youngest daughter, because of her delays, insists that her anger management problem is because of her birth father...a man whom she hasn't seen since a toddler..was in jail....she blames her anger on him because he must have had anger problems to get in jail....each time I tell her that she cant blame her behaviour on others...she has a choice.....
on the other hand...one of my other daughters does blame her brain deficiencies on her birth mother...and rightly so because the woman did drugs and alcohol while pregnant with her,...but this daughter has also come very far......she has broken the cycle because she will be able to parent a child some day and do it very well, (something her birth mother wasn't able to do with all 6 of her children)...this daughter has excelled in music and sports while struggling academically but is now stepping out into the scary adult world while she is involved in a co-op program that will hopefully give her employment in the health care field.....she's trying!

Another daughter, is working very hard to get her life back on track,...to put her luggage in the right place...to stop the rapid unravelling that was her life for the past few years...and she's doing it! There was a day when she blamed her luggage for everything but now she has perspective and it's wonderful to see....she has a future and it's good...I wont go into any more detail cause she would be upset with me....

...there is a son....he struggled with his luggage for awhile....but he was able to give it a mighty shove and although his life is unravelling very slowly...a little to slowly for him right now....it's still going to be good as long as he stays focused...and I think he will....but another son..well, his luggage still defines him and probably always will....he's become comfortable with it...the weight of it is his security...he's afraid to put it down because then he'd actually have to stand on his own...it's very sad to see.....

We all have our luggage don't we.....we have to be so careful how we let it define us....my life does unravel differently than others....it has from before I was born.....before I was knit together in my mother's womb.....God has defined it that way...why?....I have no earthly idea....someday I'll find out but for now.....it is good.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Pretty Please with sugar on it....

Emma is pushing all my buttons and I will admit that some times she's succeeding ...but I will not show her that....I refuse.

Things are really difficult right now.......

is there anyone out there that would like a perfectly cantankerous , arrogant, mouthy, disrespectful, annoying ,rude, cruel, and all round difficult to get along with right now, 16 year old to live with them for the next 21 months until she turns 18?

Huh, huh...any takers......pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease?

Friday, February 19, 2010

Sweet William.....

...with his papa...never to young to learn the fine art of accounting.....he sat there for at least a half and hour just mesmerized by the computer screen!

Isn't that the sweetest face!.....
So today is a busy day....hubby's day off but it's filled with things to do......this morning I took second eldest daughter to get her driver's licence....and she passed!!!! yahoo! I'd been praying last night and this morning and while she was doing the test....I really wanted her to pass and I'm so very glad that she did....
My other daughter Maya is at an all day co-op with kids from all over the area...not the kids she's been in school with for the last few years.....last night she called me....she's staying a lot of the time at eldest daughter's house cause she lives closer to the co-op placement...she said the kids at this new co-op were trying to convince her to smoke...she turned them down and she was quite proud of herself..and so was I. It's hard to stand up to these kids especially when you want friends but I told Maya that these kids weren't really her friends if the were trying to get her to do something that wasn't healthy for her....I hope she can stay strong...I'd hate for her to take up that nasty habit......
Earlier this week I interviewed a therapist for Emma and today she goes for her first session.....we'll see if this therapist is the right fit for Emma....
So, other than having some major issues with my parents...my mother's still refusing to have help come in and my dad has been quite ill with an abscess on his back....not good when you're a diabetic......the problem is that because of my mom's dementia she doesn't see that there is a problem and gets quite angry when you suggest that there is......you have to keep reminding yourself that this is the disease...not my mom talking....it does get frustrating though.....
Hope you ladies have a wonderful weekend!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Straight From the Heart...dinner/movie

Here's the crew....plating the lasagna..... Eldest daughter was on microwave duty.....after cooking 10 lasagne's then some needed a little rewarming....
Sister Adele and her hubby.....


Our pastors, on the left and their friend on the right...



Lovely archway...









Tables all ready to go...






Shot taken before the lights were dimmed, the candles lit and the background music cued....






Last Saturday night eldest daughter and I headed up a fundraiser dinner in support of the missionaries that our church helps support. We did it on behalf of our MountainKids...that's what we call our Sunday school program. We set the tables for 66....most of them were filled, and actually if all the staff had been able to sit down and eat then they would have been...but we were much too busy in the kitchen. When I explained to everyone, before the movie started just why we weren't showing the advertised movie...well, everyone was quite gracious ..in fact...some came to me afterward and said I had made an excellent choice! That part was good....the only thing that really was discouraging about the whole evening was that except for the teachers and spouses, and one other couple, no other parents of the MountainKids chose to come. When we heard that the problem might be lack of child care...well, we quickly scrambled and offered that too..thus the one couple did change their plans and came in support of their children. After we did our fundraiser last year, a lot of these couples, that didn't come this time, said...'you should do this again...we need more of these social times!"....so we did.
My daughter speaks of this on her blog and I must repeat it....what does it take to get people to be involved...what exactly do they want....the big hue and cry these days is that it is very hard to impress and involve our kids in things that don't absolutely wow and grab them...what do they call that?...'shock and awe'....I think....well, I would suggest that the parents are getting just as bad.
It sure does make you think twice about doing something like that again.



Friday, February 12, 2010

Straight From the Heart...

Good Morning company Girls!

Well, I had truly hoped to put some pics with this post...but.....we got a new camera at Christmas time and I haven't yet put pics on my computer with it and I forgot to get hubby to show me when he got home last night......so....no pics...sorry.

I did not post last week, and a few of you checked up on me which was sooooooo very nice....I appreciated it and thank you very much.

A week ago last Sunday, hubby and I travelled north for 3 hours and visited my eldest son and his wife and new babe for the afternoon. As you know from my blog, things have not been easy for them with the new babe, so Jenn and William came back with us for the week! On the way home, it was dark and very snowy...they call it lake effect.....I could not see in front of me but hubby grew up in snow conditions and he plowed through without any problems using his GPS to stay on the road when he couldn't see the actual road!

Once home, we settled into a week of having a two month old in the house. What a treat!...to actually get to know our grandson, his personality, his likes and dislikes was truly a delight!
I joked with my son last night that I'd trade him my 4 teens for his son anytime!

On the Emma front....people have suggested that we get her into some counselling...I was less than impressed with the people at the government child and adolescent place....you see, Emma is 16 so according to them, that's the age of consent and she doesn't have to have counselling if she doesn't want it and if she agrees to it, we cant be part of it unless she gives permission....I said to the social worker...'but this is affecting her dad and I and the rest of the family, when do we tell our side?'.....she just reiterated that it would only happen if Emma gave permission. So, now she's been walking around the house, verbally pushing our buttons with a secretive smile on her face. I think she's trying to push us into doing something either in our words or actions that she can take to the counselor, with a 'see, I told you they were terrible' attitude. I've decided, on the advice of some other people to go with private counselling.....of course very expensive, but I don't feel comfortable with the government funded counselling. I hope that this is the answer.

This Saturday evening, we are having a dinner/movie evening at our church....I am buying and preparing food for about 60 people. Not too bad...I figure if I can handle 25-26 at Christmas time that you just triple the number and you're good to go! We ran into a little glitch with the movie we were going to show and were advertising...I ordered this movie from Amazon about a month ago, that all the reviews said was a lovely romantic story and a very 'clean' movie...well...it just arrived this week and upon viewing it I found that there was just too much language and social drinking in it to show in the church. Even though people will sit in their living rooms and watch the same thing and think nothing of it...I'm sure they'd get their ire up at seeing it in the church...so...I had to scramble to get another movie......I finally found one at the local Christian bookstore that I could rent,...I brought it home and viewed it and am very pleased with it...it's a much better fit for the situation. Of course, now I'll have to stand up in front of the 60 people that'll be watching it and explain why they aren't seeing the movie that we've been advertising for weeks!

I hope you all have a wonderful Valentine's Day with your significant other......hubby's told me that he's taking me out to dinner on Sunday and it's a surprise place! Would be nice if it was Bermuda, Texas or Arizona....although Sedona is pretty cold right now...so maybe not Arizona...anyways, since I know our finances there isn't a chance of that happening...but I'm sure our supper will be lovely....anything I don't have to make has got to be good!

Have a good one, ladies!

Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Pausing....

Today I pause to remember what would have been, how my life and family changed so much because of what happened 31 years ago today. On that day, my third child was born....she had died many days before.......

In our book club we are reading Randy Alcorn's book Dominion....he makes heaven so real....it really gets you to thinking.....is Leah celebrating her birthday too?.....I hope so.....

Happy Birthday Leah Catherine!